Irritable Mom Syndrome, Pt. 1

"Mom!"

"Momeeeeeeee!"

"Hey, Mom?"

That's it! I'm changing my name to Bob. If my name were Bob, and not Mom, then I could ignore every demand addressed to Mom, right?

I have a headache and a sore throat. It seems all I've heard all day is whining and fighting. If we had a dog, I'd literally kick him out the door. {It's probably a good thing we don't.}

The school day is only half successful. I do my best to teach Cherith while Ethan complains and whines because I won't give him a third glass of chocolate milk, let him carry around the entire, just opened box of cereal, draw on the table with a marker, drag more toys out of the closet to add to his already huge mess, or watch a "Mommy/Daddy movie".

I do my best to teach Cherith and deal with Ethan while Faith was climbing all over me and all over the table, pushing everything off the table, and closing Cherith's books while she's using them.

When Daryn comes over to tell me all about the new contraption he just made, I loose my patience and tell him he'll have to wait. The poor kid is visibly crushed as I suck all excitement out of him.

And that's when the guilt comes in. I give him a hug, tell him I am sorry for snapping at him, and ask him to tell me about his contraption. He says he forgot what he was going to say. I kiss him and say I am sorry.

I pull Faith off the table for the hundredth time and tell Ethan to turn off his whiner siren or he'll end up in his room by himself.

I turn to Cherith and tell her to read the words in her book. At this point, she is just as frustrated as I am and cannot even think straight enough to remember how to read.

I sigh and tell her it's recess time. We only accomplished five minutes of schoolwork in the past 45 minutes.

As she runs off to the living room and her siblings follow her, a heavy weight settles upon me. I am the most important person in their little lives right now. More than anyone else in the world right now, they need to know in their deepest of deepest that their mother loves them more immensely. I'm pretty sure I certainly did not demonstrate love to them in the last 45 minutes.

The thing is... this wasn't just a rare bad day. Days like these happen more frequently than I'd like. There's always something that makes me feel irritable with the very people I live for. I guess I have a case of Irritable Mom Syndrome.

In an effort to address this issue, I have to figure out the cause of irritability and acknowledge it for what it is. You can't solve a problem if you don't know what the problem is. {I was never good at the "x+y-z=15... Find y" stuff.}

But, we'll put that off for next time. :)